ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Randomize
