i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
