On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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