I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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