My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
