im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
no. you can't hotbox the world.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
No subtext here. People are naked.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
