whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
My vagina is very pro this idea
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
