hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
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Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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