you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
