Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
