The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
