dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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