Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
