Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize