i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
