her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
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I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
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As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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