You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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