so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize
