you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
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