So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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