I'm drive I can fine osifer
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
