I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
