No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
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