So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
