Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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