he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
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