Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
