i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
