one word: firstdatebathroomanal
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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