Don't you send me to vm
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Randomize