can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Randomize
