lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
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