I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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