even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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