you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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