where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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