belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I believe in your delicious
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
