Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
