Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
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