dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Fuck appropriateness.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
