Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
