I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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