I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
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