It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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