how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
