you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Randomize
