i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Randomize
