we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
