How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
