VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
